Mr Already Made VS Mr Ambitious

Hello… It’s me… I was wondering if after all these months you’d like to read again … Girls Talk… oh yes! It’s girls talk again! And I have a very interesting, and debative topic today. It’s a long read but it’s definitely worth your time. (if it’s not please comment but abuse me small lol ). Everyone’s opinion both male and female is welcome.

So I was just going through Nairaland’s topic and I came across this very interesting topic “Ladies Already made guy or young ambitious guy who would you date?”. A particular comment caught my attention and it was made by a male, he said‎:

” I’m not a lady but if I were one and have the option of dating a guy between a duo who possess equal attributes, I would go for the ready-made guy over the ambitious one.

Please, let’s be realistic. That we all kick against women who are materialistic doesn’t negate the importance of financial security and it essential role in a relationship or marriage. Does ambition pay bills?”

Interesting! Don’t you think? Well this topic is a broad topic, it’s a kind of topic where other topic arises from. From here now we can go on and talk about how women are materialistic or how girls of nowadays only want already made men, or how after suffering and toiling with your man and he eventually makes it he then begins to see faults in you, and that reminds me of this saying “Nearly all men can stand adversity, but if you want to test a man’s true character give him money and power”

One bitter truth is love doesn’t pay bills money does. So should a girl be criticized, looked upon as materialistic, thought of as a bad person if she only wants already made man?
Most people do say it’s better to suffer and toil with him so that when the money comes, when the breakthrough comes you would know you are entitled to all… really? Hmmmm
Another man’s leftover is another man’s perfect meal.. so what if you just meet an already made man who is everything to you and vice versa! And things work out just fine between you two, does it mean you are not entitled to all his breakthroughs?
Also one important lesson we must never forget is success comes and goes… no successful person lives in past glory. You can’t say because you hit millions today you won’t work hard to hit billions tomorrow… so if you meet your man “already made” who says you can’t channel him to being much more better… already made to better made to best made and so on.

This topic is so interesting I have read so many comments online which even resulted in arguments and exchange of words. But thank God for freedom of speech! Everyone is entitled to his or her opinion, but we(Yes you and me) often abuse this freedom by trying to force down our principles on other people, just because it didn’t work for you doesn’t mean it won’t work for me. In as much as we are all entitled to our opinions we should try not be to biased or because one girl has refused to date you because you can’t provide for her hence you’re now bitter (side eyes at you), most comment online oozes bitterness from guys who think no girl would ever give them (who are not ready made) a chance, that is not true. I don’t have statistics to prove this but I think 5 out of 10 girls would give an ambitious guy a chance in their life and 4 out of these 5 guys would mess things up(just saying).

Also 5 out of 10 already made guys act like demi-gods, making it so impossible for them to even see brighter future ahead, I wonder why girls stay with rich guys that act like their God( money you say? Hmmm). On the other hand, ambition is priceless. Little beginnings beget great things, the real men who work hard to be ready made all started from little beginnings so I put it to you again that ambition is priceless.

Either way, your views and opinions are welcomed… won’t it be nice if we have married people contribute to this too? Unbiased comments remember? ‎And well if you want my own sincere contribution just read this post all over again *big grin
But honestly I’m indifferent…
And oh I’m not responsible for what you think about my contribution…
Please stay safe wherever you are.

Please check out previous hot topics here, these are topic that drew so much traffic to my blog when I first started.. well until I became lazy (*sadface). Please read, drop your comments and share! Thank you.

The Ex’s New Girlfriend

Conversation Starters

WHAT SHALL IT PROFIT YOU TO DIE IN THE HANDS OF A MAN YOU LOVE

SCHOOL OR MARRIAGE?

BETWEEN FATHERS AND DAUGHTERS

A GIRL’S SELF ESTEEM

IN A MAN’S WORLD

WHAT DO GIRLS TALK ABOUT?

REALITY CHECK

FOURTY ONE MORE DAYS TO GO…

Yes you read that right, it’s 41days, 15hours, 48minutes, 44seconds (as at the time I’m writing this post) to 2016!
Ok it would be unfair if I just start my post like that without introducing myself *big grin. Yes it’s me! The ghost writer! The one who disappears and re appears! And no I’m not back full time… I’m really sorry. Due to what writing does to me (makes me feel light hearted and well the rest is our little secret) I decided to write on reality check. I had a good night rest and I’m feeling super elated this morning. Well that’s what happens when you’re positive and expectant about certain milestones… I can almost taste the victory. So enough of me already let’s get down to the main talk.

I’m not here to put up any motivational speech or scold or advise, I’m just here because recently events have happened in my life, surrounding (and of course yours too) that has shaped me to believing anything can happen. Yes anything! and whatever it is that happens or has happened has the ability to shape us to who we are and what the future holds for us. I’m just here to encourage You, yes you, you who feel this year has been a waste or nothing has happened for you, no milestones no new beginnings no nothing!

Ok maybe I’d do a little motivational speech but hey! It’s coming from someone who is also going through life changing events so you’re not alone. I used to wonder why at the beginning of a year people make “new year resolutions” I used to do it, but trust me by February I have forgotten half of it..lol so I just mop along and wait for things to happen. Honestly living life without direction sucks! And the good news is, its never too late to start having a direction, Isn’t it realistic to say every new day is a new opportunity to start something new, you don’t have to wait till the start of a new year to make such resolutions. So here’s a few of mine which if it applies to you, you should adopt.

Ever felt like you’re stagnant? Nothing is happening for you? Yes I know you have and you feel oh the world is so so unfair to me and nothing good is happening? Then you just wake up and watch the news and see how people die daily? How your life is just awesome and how you have been ungrateful? So here’s what I’m going to do, not like I haven’t been appreciative of this life God has given me, I have, but I have doubted so many times the grace he has given to me to maximize it. So for the rest of this year I choose not to see the negative around me. I see milestones, I smell victory, I taste triumph….

And this is a very hard one, making a reality check of what you have achieved this year… sometimes your list can be empty… sometimes you don’t even consider some things worthy to be on your list… but we just have to find something or make something happen, something good… the clock is ticking…Tick tock… Tick tock…

I don’t have it all together neither am I perfect, it’s sort of annoying when some people think I have it all together…yea yea so I’m in this also and because I have written this doesn’t mean oh everything is perfect now, No it doesn’t work that way… but henceforth I strongly believe only good things are permitted to happen to me…

Till you get my notification in your mail box again… well Stay safe.

FOODIE 101

I am going to be joking a lot in this post but that doesn’t mean it’s not a serious post, it’s a very serious issue, food makes the world go round so I’m jokingly serious you should see my straight face now. 

The definition of a foodie according to most dictionary is a person who is particular about food. (you should see the big smile on my face). I’m a proud foodie! My love for food knows no bound. My brother says I need deliverance(lol). Asides the fact that I went to a catering school (I still intend to attend more culinary schools in the future, maybe I would even be a big time chef you know cook in aso rock or white house *big-grin)  I know some haters would do the “yimu” y”all should gerarahere!! 

There are foodies and there are foodies. I’m just going to talk about foodies as I have seen them.

1) There are the fit fam foodies which sadly I’m not part of because I’m on a sea-food diet, I see food, I smell food, I imagine food and I eat! Fitfam foodies are people who cook healthy food that contains no or low numbers of calories they eat things like leaf and the rest (*rolling my eyes).

2) There are the hipstar foodies:  these are people who often upload their meals on social media they learn how to cook these food on social media! They won’t touch that food until they have braged about how long they spent in the kitchen preparing the delicious colorful meal. Thanks to darling google. 

3) The DIY Foodies : why should we waste so much money on chinese food when I can make it at home? Their conversation always goes like that. They have little gardens they believe they don’t need to eat out paying so much when they can conveniently cook the meal themselves. I can be in this category sometimes but not all the time. 

4) The sensitive stomach foodie ; they can’t just eat anything anywhere, they love food but they are picky! I also fall in this  Category yes I do! I fall in all category Infact. I love ketchup but no way I’m letting the food attendant put it on my hotdog or add cheese or mayonnaise laye! Laye! Ko jo! I love my hotdog plain. 

5) The TV foodie: Don’t get jealous o but I also fall in this category!  I love to watch hell’s kitchen! Oh how I love how the head chef yells and yells! One day he will probably have his lungs replaced because they would fly out from so much yelling (LMAO). This category of foodie won’t even make that meal if it’s not cooked by a chef or shown on TV( maagi moments, knor shows and the rest). 

The list goes on and on but I will stop here. I am deeply sorry I can’t put up pictures for now (sad face), even my smileys ain’t working, but I am working on it, I have  food pictures on my phone, the ones I made of course plus the ones I stole from social media. I would let you come over and  see them if you send me a mail not less than 300 words convincing me you’re not a stalker or serial killer. 
None of my friends in school who reads this should come to my room for food please! I barely cook in school it’s zero  Percent convenient. The not so clean kitchennet  is far from my room and most times no water! Plus market is too far! That’s why home is truly where the heart is, especially my brother’s house, very comfy kitchen AC, TV and all the things that makes cooking fun! I better gerarahere before his wife catches me. 

Any foodie in the house should please send me a mail or drop a comment and let’s see how to make this Food court session bigger and better! Other comments are welcome too.

Have a blessed week ahead, keep smiling and stay thankful. 

NK’s DIARY (4)

NK’s DIARY (4).

NK’s DIARY (4)

Dear Diary,

I’m back again with my story, hope you don’t feel my stories are stories that touch the heart o. Anyway remember Mr hunk, mr nice charisma, intelligent, great job? Oh and yea mr baby mama! The one who dared me to get into a relationship just for the fun of it and break someone’s heart, but it won’t be him? What did you think I did? Let him be or go right ahead with my fling and was it successful? Well it was the latter but Ermmm it wasn’t successful…

Yes curse me all you want I know I wasn’t supposed to go ahead but I just wanted to see if I can break someone’s heart just has mine has been broken severally! This is the perfect scene where an elderly person draws ones ears and say I told you so didn’t i? I know you are eager to know all that went down I would gladly spill maybe it would ease me of this stupidity I have been feeling.

So I kept on entertaining him, kept on hanging around him, flirting with him but keeping my cool. I felt like a good girl turn bad bitch and to think I was only digging my own emotional pit chai I fell so so hard my bones are broken. I’m so sore from severe beating o! Chai I know you are laughing at me… in this my life and the next to come no more flirting with a baby daddy o! Infact no more fling, flirt abi whatever you call it. Little did I know baby mama was a craze woman I mean forget about her tattoos and eye and nose piercing she looked decent when she first approached me at the mall, she was wearing a pair of white jeans with a crop top which reveal her hand and back tattoo. Very pretty lady a size eight or there about and yes team light skin.

“Hi doll, I’m sogo’s sister” she said with the cutest smile, she stretched out her hand and I took it and said hi back. (Sogo is Mr hunk).

“I’m sorry to interrupt your day but my brother would kill me if I don’t do this for him. He’s told me a lot about you and really he’s tired of playing around. He’s asked me to bring you to him for a little surprise”

“OMG are you serious” I replied trying to hide my excitement.

See as I was happy! Finally! Mr Hard man falls! And he doesn’t even have enough courage to do it himself poor boy had to involve his sister! The next 10minutes it took us to walk back to the car pack I was blushing. So finally my tease and flirting got him, I already told him I was going to the mall to shop for underwear and teased him I would send pictures of myself in it when I get home. So the yeye boy could not wait ehn! Finally! All my tricks worked! Ermmm I’m too ashamed to even write all the silly things we chat about here and how I always “looked for his trouble” like he said.

When we got to the car pack, I recognize his 2014 Range Rover sports I was so excited. She opened the door and I did a quick search but could not see mr hunk!

“Where is he?’ I asked my mood changing almost immediately

“He’s waiting for you in hell idiot!” she replied and pushed me in. The girl driving was a lot thicker than her. Another girl was also in the front seat lighting a cigarette.

“What is going on here!” I asked forming angry. One hot slap landed on my pretty face! Chai! Jesus! Is this a kidnap? Have I been kidnapped? I see these things happen in movies but to me? Jesus this can’t be real I have been kidnapped!!!

“Next time u go sabi the kin man u go dey mess around with foolish ashawo!” the girl driving replied and turned on the ignition and zoomed out.

I thought it was a dream. Infact dear diary you should imagine what happened next o! They seized my phone my bag and covered my eyes, I was crying and mucus was dripping from my nose they kept on laughing and talking, saying so I’m not even a bad bitch yet I would be forming one on my chats with Sogo. I really don’t know which area they drove me to but it was a nice house and I recognize the interior from mr hunk’s pictures! They beat me no be small! I have been seeing nollywood do this but alas! Nollywood came to me! I was beaten and told to leave mr hunk alone!
The baby mama herself told me Sogo is hers and her baby alone and no ashawo would come between them.
No wonder he told me if I’m going to break anyone’s heart it won’t he him! I’m free to curse him shey?

I’m soo tired and my hand is numb from writing, how I got home? Ha another story for another day. I’m just so sad, I was just having fun and finding my way back to happiness but what do I keep getting? Infact heartbreak is better than this beating that I got. Dear diary I need to go and take my pain killers and as usual cry myself to sleep.

No Title

It’s been Ten months and three days… 10 months and 3days I disappeared from something that makes me happy, an avenue for me to air my views and show my skills… 10months and 3days since I stopped blogging, but I never stopped writing. Do I have excuses and reasons ? Oh yes so many! Are they enough for me to be away for so long? Well…. Have I quit writing? No..Never. Am I going through a lot? Yes everyone does… I’m I back to blogging I don’t know yet. I’m just amazed I still get comment on my old posts, and when I’m enabling the comment I just smile, thanks to everyone who still read my old post and thanks to those who have been bombarding me with lots of questions about why I stopped blogging, and also thanks for your kind words. And to those who totally forgot about me even when we where inseparable from the start of this blogging experience,(oya catch your sub *big grin) it’s well I didn’t keep in touch but I never forgot about you, I still visit your blogs and marvel at how awesome you all are.
This post isn’t a “post” or “rant” it’s just me saying hi! I’m alive! I still have it in me! I’m just taking time off to focus more on a particular phase of my life which when I finally come out of (strong and successful of course) I would be back.
Since I love short stories, I should continue with NK’s diary or Girl’s Hostel. (I’m not promising yet)
Have a good weekend and a lovely week ahead.
God bless you and you (e-hugs &kisses)

Motivational Quotes

Hi Lovelies, having a good week? I hope you are 🙂 Enjoy these motivational quotes, share with friends and don’t forget to catch your sub 😀

Quote two is so true and powerful,Quote four…WORD!

1)”If there’s a will, prosperity can’t be far behind.”

– W. C. Fields: American comedian, actor, juggler and writer

2)”Motivation is what gets you started. Habit is what keeps you going.”

– Jim Rohn: American entrepreneur, author and motivational speaker

3)”Success is the sum of small efforts, repeated day in and day out.”

– Robert Collier: American author of self-help, and New Thought metaphysical books
 

4)”It’s simple arithmetic: Your income can grow only to the extent that you do.”

– T. Harv Eker: author, businessman and motivational speaker

5)“Thousands of candles can be lighted from a single candle, and the life of the candle will not be shortened. Happiness never decreases by being shared.”
Buddha

6)
“Happiness is the art of never holding in your mind the memory of any unpleasant thing that has passed.”
Unknown

7)
“The moments of happiness we enjoy take us by surprise. It is not that we seize them, but that they seize us.”
Ashley Montagu

8)
“Don’t rely on someone else for your happiness and self-worth. Only you can be responsible for that. If you can’t love and respect yourself – no one else will be able to make that happen. Accept who you are – completely; the good and the bad – and make changes as YOU see fit – not because you think someone else wants you to be different.”
Stacey Charter

9)“There is only one way to happiness and that is to cease worrying about things which are beyond the power of our will.”
Epictetus

Well my sub, Quotes 6,8&9…. 😀 I’m smiling because I’m getting better! I’m getting there! And so should you! Stay bright everyone and stay Ebola free!

Nk’s Diary(3)

Dear Diary,
 
Where do I even start from? A lot has been going on and this would take me away from my mission of finding out what I did wrong in my past relationships. Well I hope I’m not making a fool of myself because for the past one week I have been messing around with this hunk.. Yes I would call it messing around.
 
No no dear diary, no sex yet! But If I continue to mess around with him I think I am going to really hurt myself. Truth is the brother is hot chocolate! Too fine! He’s in his early 30’s, very intelligent and has a great job. Great body, nice charisma, great sense of humour… So what’s the messing around for? You ask?
 
He has a son, and he’s trying to work out things with his Baby Mama but he likes me and wants nothing serious, just a fling. I don’t think this is what I need right now? I am becoming emotionally attached to him.
 
Last week over a lunch date, I told him of how I have been a good girl but unlucky with men. ”You need a break Nike, I mean a break. Break someone’s heart too, get into a relationship just for the fun of it and break a man’s heart too. Well, unfortunately it won’t be me because I don’t want any commitment” he muttered in his usually sleek voice.

It was a rude shock but the odds of resisting him gets slimmer by the day. Sometimes I think I’m possessed by some wierd love spirit. How would a man lay his sinister motive on the lunch table and I still want to mess around with him?
 
But guess what, I have decided that I am going to make him fall for me and very hard too. He doesn’t know about my intentions yet but I will give him two weeks. And I don’t care if he later leaves but I just want to see him crawl back to me, I want to see him in his lowest state! Infact I’m so pissed and more determined writing this! I don’t care if I get hurt! But this is what I am going to do.
 
Dear diary, I know you are scared for me right now. I am nervous too but I just want to prove to him that it’s not always a man’s world. I am sure I can. Become a side chick? Is that what you are thinking? I am too good for that? Is that your thought again? Sigh! Those are my thoughts too. That still calm voice in my head is telling me that I should let him go. A fling with a hunk won’t bring answers to my questions.

Now I’m really in a fix! Should I or should I not? Sigh! I hate to feel this way dear diary, but don’t worry I would be back soon to tell you how it all went down. And no I haven’t decided what to do yet.
 

Inspiration Thursday

Its the last day of the month of July and what better way to end the month than to inspire ourselves and be hopeful for the remaining part of the year. I get inspired by these pictures and wonderful quotes on self love, and no matter how hard or uneasy it feels I try to always apply them. You can also use the comment box to add any wonderful quotes you have to inspire anyone out there, Enjoy! 🙂

-You can be the most beautiful person in the world and everybody sees lights and rainbow when they look at you, but if you yourself, don’t know it, all of that doesn’t even matter. Every second that you spend on doubting your worth, every moment that you use to criticise yourself; is a second of your life wasted, is a moment of your life thrown away, its not like you have forever, so don’t waste any of your seconds, don’t throw even one of your moment away. (C.Joybell C)

-The person in life that you will always be with the most is yourself, Because even when you are with others, you are still with yourslef too! When you wake up in the morning you are with yourself, laying in bed at night, walking down the street in the sunlight, you are with yourself. What kind of person do you want to wake up with? See at the end of the day before you fall asleep? Because that person is yourself and its your responsibility to be that person you want to be with. I know I want to spend my life with a person who knows how to let things go, who’s not full of hate, who’s able to smile and be carefree, so that’s who I have to be. (C Joybell C)

Do have a great day ahead!

NK’s Diary(2)

Dear Diary, I’m feeling a little over the top today, and I can’t really say why. Maybe its because of you or because of the young man I met yesterday, well I won’t say much about him for now I am still on my quest to finding out the things I did wrong in my past relationships.

For a year and few months, I allowed myself to get overwhelmed by men who profound their undying love for me. I enjoyed lots of attention…attention, I love that shit! Well who doesn’t? Whenever I felt like eating chinese trust me I know who to call, if it was white house I know just who to call, but it was all fun and games until he came along. He’s Long(well I won’t call him tall because he’s skinny) not my type of guy anytime anyday. The only fascinating thing was his age and baby face. He was 29 going on 30 yet he had the face of a 24year old. What even attracted me to him? Maybe his charisma, the way he addresses situations with so much calmness, so much maturity. Well I could not help myself, I found myself falling again. You know that thing us girls say? “Never will I get my heart broken again! Never, I will show this my next boyfriend that I’m no cheap girl, I won’t cry for him, I won’t show him too much care bla bla bla”

Well that was me! Tunde was a gentleman I agree, he was sweet, nice and loving and unlike Johnson I gave him so much space, I didn’t want to choke him or be the lovey dovy girlfriend but I made sure he trusted me enough because I was loyal to him. On my 23rd birthday he got me a Torch2 how sweet! I became the talk of my class, I had the latest phone, nice hair, lovely shoes I was always glowing.

Dearest diary, remember I said he’s a gentleman? Calm? Doesn’t raise his voice against me or anyone? He even rarely argues with me, he always let me win. Also remember I said I didn’t choke him much? I always gave him space but still managed to keep a tab on him? Now tell me where I went wrong again o! 8months gone and my bobo dumped me over the phone! The text message is still fresh in my head

“Nike, you’re an amazing lady, and these months with you have been great but I don’t think we are meant for each other. We don’t argue much, we don’t fight much everything seem to be going too smoothly and that scares me, though you didn’t give me any reason to doubt your loyalty but I’m just scared we might have serious issues if we continue. I like my lady fierce and you are not, I’m a perfect gentleman you know that I need a lady that would task me a lot but you’re also a calm girl. I wish you all the best. If you need anything I’m here for you. Bye I’m sorry for the pain.”

I think its high time I delete the stupid message off my phone n head! Who does that? What have I done wrong again? I was fierce with Johnson and he cheated anyway. Now I’m calm with Tunde and he still dumped my ass! And he had to do it over the phone? A text message? I saved myself any embarrassment and didn’t call him or reply and guess what? He never called! Why would he even think I would call on him for any help? Why? Jesus! I have suffered no be small. So tell me now what have I done wrong? Was it a crime to love that man tenderly and give him space? I thought men loves women who gives them all the space they need! I’m having a headache already dear diary his thoughts makes me want to vomit! I just can’t deal…

(…To be continued…)